my friend left her window open in her bedroom and came back to find this
look at his self-satisfied little face, the cheeky shit
if there was a post to describe australia, this is it
you mean to tell me this isn’t even a pet bird?
that in australia, you have wild birds that just fly from house to house with the express purpose of fucking shit up?
fucking HELL australia, what is wrong with you?
wake up australia
That’s what birds do
They fly around and fuck shit up
Do you have some kind of mysterious nice birds in your weird foreign country
Do birds in America and England fly into your house and make the bed and tidy up the living room a little bit
It’s cold here, so they just bounce off the windows and lie there and twitch spasmodically while you look for the shovel.
Basically hurling themselves at windows is the worst thing birds do
yeah man a kookaburra literally flew into a classroom at my high school and just sat his smug ass down on top of the desk for a good 20 minutes
why has nobody mentioned the fact that in australia there are 3-4 months a year where everybody just accepts that they’re going to get attacked by magpies. It is literally called “swooping season” and these birds will fly down to peck your fucking face, and people get their eyes ripped out and shit, it’s fucking brutal.
My teacher had to go to hospital and have surgery because of swooping season. It was in the parking lot of school and all the kids would do a mad dash towards the car as the magpies tried to kill us.
no but when you’re 12 years old and riding your bike like mad on the way home from school with an icecream bucket on your head with like branches and shit sticking out if it to scare them off and none of this is considered strange
what the actual fuck australia
"AUSTRALIA: THE COUNTRY THAT ACTIVELY TRIES TO KILL ITS INHABITANTS"
happy birthday birdbrain
we look pretty damn rad, don’t we jules?
We do look rather adorable- but did you have to put it on the blog? -J
relax, no one reads it anyway
what a fucking idiot
i want 14 of them
IT IS 6:45 IN THE AM AND YOU HAVE MADE MY DAY.
Good dog. Best cosplayer.
This is all I have ever wanted.
Humans and Animals
coolest photo set i’ve ever seen.
In my dreams.
Just a horribly confused, pickelhaube-wearing dachshund I came across in a World War I documentary.
"whats going on" "are we in France yet"
Have a history teacher explain this if they can.
Abraham Lincoln was elected to Congress in 1846.
John F. Kennedy was elected to Congress in 1946.Abraham Lincoln was elected President in 1860.
John F. Kennedy was elected President in 1960.
Both were particularly concerned with civil rights.
Both wives lost a child while living in the White House.
Both Presidents were shot on a Friday.
Both Presidents were shot in the head.
Now it gets really weird.
Lincoln’s secretary was named Kennedy.
Kennedy’s Secretary was named Lincoln.
Both were assassinated by Southerners.
Both were succeeded by Southerners named Johnson.
Andrew Johnson, who succeeded Lincoln, was born in 1808.
Lyndon Johnson, who succeeded Kennedy, was born in 1908.
John Wilkes Booth, who assassinated Lincoln, was born in 1839.
Lee Harvey Oswald, who assassinated Kennedy, was born in 1939.
Both assassins were known by their three names.
Both names are composed of fifteen letters.
Now hang on to your seat.
Lincoln was shot at the theater named “Ford.”
Kennedy was shot in a car called “Lincoln” made by “Ford.”
Booth and Oswald were assassinated before their trials.
And here’s the “kicker”:
A week before Lincoln was shot, he was in Monroe, Maryland.
A week before Kennedy was shot, he was with Marilyn Monroe.AND……………….:
Lincoln was shot in a theater and the assassin ran to a warehouse…
Kennedy was shot from a warehouse and the assassin ran to a theater…
I saw this had to share just in case anyone did not know.
I WILL NEVER CEASE TO REBLOG THIS
Mare all of these legit?! Hey, USA followers, is it legit?
Selfie status while my homegirl choke a ging bitch